Step 5: Let Go

Finally, after all of that work, we can sigh it all out and simply let go. I say simply, because at this stage there should be no more ill feelings left unturned, no dark recesses of our minds left unlit. Letting go is the easiest stage in this whole process. Any blockage to do this, means that we should revisit the other stages and find whatever we haven’t dealt with yet. 

The mental act of letting go can feel like throwing off a heavy backpack or burden. Our shoulders might be a bit sore, but time will heal that. If simply sighing it out doesn’t cut it for you, there are other methods you can use to let go and I’d like to go over some of them: 

First of all, we can visualise letting go through various means. We can imagine that the whole experience shatters into a million pieces; we can envision that the experience burns up, leaving nothing but smoke and ash behind, dissipating away on the wind of our breath; we can imagine it gently or violently leaving our body, like a spectre which has haunted us until we exorcised it. Whatever works for you. Such imagery can be further reinforced by bringing them into the physical world: such as writing it on a piece of paper and watching it burn.

Secondly, we can attempt to feel it leaving our body, without any imagery, just as negative energy. One such feeling is allowing it to flow through our feet into the earth. Another is inhaling new, invigorating energy, while at the same time gathering all of those negative emotions in our chest, and then exhaling them all out. 

Another act that can be extremely liberating is crying it out, letting it flow out of us through our tears. Big boys don’t cry, they say, but that macho mindset makes for a lot of pent up frustration, anger, insecurity, toxicity and negativity. So just let loose and cry. There’s nothing wrong with it, it’s not a sign of weakness, but rather the maturity to accept that we need it in order to heal and move forward. However, because of our upbringing and conditioning, crying might not come easy, but one equally powerful gesture is screaming it out. Inhale to gather it all up into a ball in your chest and let it all out in the form of a scream, tensing your whole body into it and then relaxing. As many times as it takes. Or just write it on a balloon and pop it.

Whatever your method, whether gentle or violent, let it all out, let it all go, then smile at the new life that lies in front of you.